Pulling A Will Hunting.

In the flick Good Will Hunting, one Matt Damon, young and Hollywood hungry, portrays the character in the title Will Hunting. He’s this tough ass young man from Boston who likes to party with his friends. This is what he wants you to know about him or to see him as. As the movie progresses, we discover Will is really this genius math wizard with an extraordinarily bright future, only he doesn’t want to be known as the smart guy so he fights the system. And even later in, we find out he is the way he is, choosing to live life as this rough around the edges guy, as a result of the physical and emotional abuse he received growing up in various foster homes. Ultimately, as is classic Hollywood, Will Hunting makes the right choice and becomes the man he was always destined to be.

The strongest storyteller here, for me, is the tale of being held back. Walled in and by our own personal doing. It’s universal, manifested in every single humans life, to one degree or another. At one or more times. It’s in books and in movies. We are our greatest adversaries.

And for some, it’s as simple as recognizing it, using rational cognitive thought in identifying it as a weakness and then steps are made and carried out to remove the man-made prison and live freely, not at war with oneself.

But then there’s the rest of us. Either an addicted mindset or a beaten down for decades mindset is a tougher battle to wage war on. I’m not saying it’s impossible in the least, but it does require a different set of tools. Calling on a higher power, for one. When your mind has been poisoned one way or another and for great lengths of time, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to tell you your thinking is just a tad muddy. Off. Jumbled. Locked up. In my own journey with alcoholism, the only way to freedom and to clarity is God.

I like being the bad boy. The big, strong, tough guy. But it’s never been true, like our Will Hunting. Sure, he can throw a punch and swear but does that make him a menace? I’ve found myself in roles in life where my size and my bad boy mentality has benefited me but ultimately it’s just that, a role I am able to play. It’s not who I am.

In movies like this, it takes the course of the story to get our star to where he should be and where we want to see him. Then it’s off into the sunset and we just naturally assume he’ll never screw up again.

I feel like now is when I am morphing into that person I’ve always wanted to be. I’m not talking over the next 6 years will I fully evolve. It’s a right-now thing. I’ve been ready, I just havent made myself fully available to the removal of my four walls and my ceiling. The war against myself has gone on far too long. I’m way overdue for a giant V.

So as the credits roll, the world can know that he’s done it. He’s pulled A Good Will Hunting. ‘Cept he did it the hard way. He took the long way home. And home may be where his heart is but this journey is no where near from being over.

By Hearts Erased

A blogger for 6 years, I now have my poetry collection being published.

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