Let me be amidst the quiet for it’s where I want to be.
Anybody inhabiting this thing called life knows the beauty of quiet. Of stillness. Our day to days bustle and hustle steals it from us, caught up in the chaos. Our jobs pile on stress and noise, not the steady rhythms of peace we so long for. We come home and our sanctuaries are a hot mess of kids clamoring for attention and chores requiring more lost “me” time. The unequivocal nightmare of your day leaves a ringing in your ears and a sadness in your soul, just as tomorrow creeps its ugly head.
With the past few months off work I did find an ample amount of quiet. I took many, many walks. When the kids were gone to grandma’s. When the kids went back to school. And during this time I managed to re-align that ability to find peace when you’re in the thick of the noise. Albeit a brief escape but it allows one to find focus and just enough strength to get through to the other side.
Soon I’ll be bombarded by the nine to five grunts and grinds, and all that time I’ve had in its place goes up like a puff of smoke. The appointments for my girls will begin to overwhelm. The time and money lost in making lunches and fueling for the commute won’t go unnoticed. Soon the yearning for time off will be back again, as though fourteen weeks was not quite enough. I guess I could whine all day if I put my heart into it.
The good news is, though above are certain inescapable facts, that my day job isn’t the stuff of stressors. I’ve never felt a “case of the Monday’s”. There is no dread in returning, in fact, the total opposite. Three months off is nice but I need adult interaction. Spending extra time with the kids and cats can be rewarding, surely, but certain parts of me are lacking and dying. There is replenishment in work. In it there is no shame.
So as we move into the final months of the infamous year 2020 a new season is definitely at hand. If I can keep one hand securely around this avatar of peace whilst swinging my machete as I advance I will remain in a good place. As Jesus once slept soundly through a terrifying storm in treacherous waters surrounded by screaming, out-of-their-minds men I too can find such calm and claim it as my own.