Recently, Fort McMurray, Alberta, has suffered devastating fires large enough to empty out all 80,000 inhabitants, burning almost everything in its path. It’s a horrific story of natural disaster, not unlike the fires of Slave Lake in 2011 or the vast floods of Calgary in 2013.
Multiple tens of thousands of people have been displaced. They’ve not only lost their homes but their belongings, possibly pets, their jobs, their lives in general. It’s very disconcerting and I don’t wish this disaster piece on anyone.
But this posting isn’t about Fort Mac. It isn’t about natural disasters, near or far. What I want to touch base on is displacement. Let’s Google that word. “Displacement is a vector quantity that refers to ‘how far out of place an object is’; it is the objects overall change in position”, sayeth Dr. Google.
Let me pose a question… not to single out any women readers (you mean the world to me equally as any man would and I can’t believe I’m saying this in these terms but it’s very true!) But men.. age matters not.. how many of you feel like I do and that is displaced?
We’re born and we die. Oh, a lot happens in between, as well. Some of us fit into life like a piece in a puzzle. Maybe you know your calling and following it gives you this feeling of belonging. Or maybe it’s through a group of friends where uou really can be you yet that’s the only place and you’re just like me and possibly most men on the planet… displaced.
I have a wife whom I love with all of my heart. With her, I don’t need any other. I can be me and she knows it, and even though that guy is ridiculous on many levels, I fit with her. It’s with her I belong. Same goes with my kids, overall. I fit with them.
But that’s about it. In the vastness of the world, I am displaced. I don’t know where I need to be. I know where I want to be and who I want to be but is that where I fit? Will I be fulfilled and no longer displaced?
Back to relationships.. I know there are factors that disturb and displace a man. Previous experiences and relationships. Addiction to porn maybe. When he finds it hard to look himself in the eye, he is at his most distant displacement. This is know personally, I can honestly say.
One can attempt to trace ‘where I went wrong’ but ultimately I believe displacement comes from the inside. It’s instilled in us all through out child hood until now. Doesn’t mean our parents/parent failed us and didn’t raise us right. It just means that we failed to make certain connections or attachments that left us feeling like we don’t fit.
There is hope. And it’s in understanding we can’t heal on our own. We need that higher power. We need God. It’s in Him that we will find our true identity. And in time, the displacement will lessen and lessen, til the day when you truly do fit.